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Harriette Cole: The prowler in my backyard was my mother-in-law

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DEAR HARRIETTE: I have security cameras set up on the inside and outside of my home. The cameras record everything, and I can see all activity from my cellphone.

Recently, I’ve been getting alerts about activity being detected in my backyard while I’m at work. I was totally freaked out by this until I realized it is my mother-in-law creeping around my property.

She’s been looking through our windows — specifically the primary bedroom and my infant son’s room.

I talked to my husband about it, and he said that he would handle it, but he is not great at standing up to his mother.

I’ve decided to take matters into my own hands. How do I approach her without causing a huge fight?

Creeper

DEAR CREEPER: Tell your husband that you intend to talk to his mother so that you can stand in solidarity. Invite your mother-in-law over to visit. Tell her you need to talk to her about something important.

Then tell her you were concerned that someone was trying to break into your home until you discovered she has been lurking on your property. Ask her why she has been doing that. Ask her what she wants and what she is looking for. Listen to hear what possible explanation she gives you.

Next, ask her to stop. Point out that it is disconcerting for you to receive alarms of intruders at your home and, worse, to know that she seems to feel the need to stalk your home. Ask her how she would feel if someone did that to her.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I work for myself. I travel a lot for work, though it was on pause for the last two years. Now I’m traveling again, and it’s a nightmare.

On one recent trip, my flight was delayed eight hours one way and canceled for the return. I ended up missing several important meetings because of these changes. I worked it out, but it was awkward.

I need to keep my clients and have them trust me, but it is impossible to schedule my time effectively when traveling is so unpredictable. What can I say to my clients if and when this happens again?

Bad Travel

DEAR BAD TRAVEL: For many reasons, air travel is unreliable right now, which can wreak havoc on your work and personal schedules. This knowledge may not console you much, but you truly are not alone.

For now, you may want to avoid scheduling formal meetings or calls on the day after scheduled travel. Reserve those days for paperwork or for clients who will understand if you are delayed or unavailable. Alert your active clients when you are planning to be on the road so that they have an idea of your whereabouts.

Pay close attention to emails. Respond remotely whenever you can. Some airlines have Wi-Fi, which allows you to email from the air. Find out if your carrier offers this option. If so, at the very least you may be able to communicate online if you are stuck in flight.

Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.


Originally published at Harriette Cole
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